Sweet Valley High #103: Operation Love Match

Bruce Patman can’t cope with his parent’s divorce and wants to fix things. Even though Alice promised to help in the last book, here she decides that she doesn’t want to get involved, but of course the twins will help. Jessica’s horoscope says that she’s going to experience problems and she starts worrying, which becomes a major part of the book.

The twins decide to send Marie a love letter from Hank, but Jessica gets her hand stuck in the mailbox. Michael Hampton, the hot new senior sees her and she pretends to be Liz. Every time he sees her do something stupid, she pretends to be her twin, not realizing that he actually prefers girls like that because he’s kind of klutzy.

Bruce tries to get back together with Pamela, but she keeps seeing him with Liz and thinks he still has feelings for her. It’s kind of stupid though because he’s actually with Jessica all the time. They all decide to stop his parents from meeting with the divorce lawyers by sneaking onto the lawyers’ property and filling their ignition with super glue. No one points out that this is breaking like 16 laws.

Bruce gives Jess his coat, which just so happens to be exactly like his dads. She’s supposed to sneak into the lawyers’ office and lock them together until they work out their problems, but she gets trapped in the elevator. Somehow she switches coats with Hank and Marie finds Alice Wakefield’s scarf, which Jess used earlier in the pocket. That proves to her that they’re having an affair.

Jess then has Bruce send his mom dozens of goldenrod bouquets, but it turns out that she’s deathly allergic and ends up in the hospital. Hank visits, but she won’t listen to anything he says until he admits that he had an affair. He admits that work forced them apart, but eventually leaves because she doesn’t trust him and a marriage doesn’t work without trust.

Liz cons their mom into telling her all about what happened with Hank and why they’d never be together and secretly records it. Jess tested the recorder earlier, making a tape with Lila. She sneaks over to Marie’s new house and leaves the tape behind, only to realize that she left the wrong tape there. I have no idea why she didn’t just go back and switch the freaking tapes because they never act like that was a possibility.

They then decide to plan a “this is your life” moment. They arrange for the couple’s favorite song (All you need is love) to play in the screening room and arrange for the wedding souvenirs to sit on the coffee table. Jess gets her toe stuck in the bathtub faucet and when Liz tries to help, the door blows shut and gets stuck. Bruce gets a flat tire, so no one is there to meet Hank and Marie and they let themselves in.

Hank goes to the screening room and Marie picks up his coat. She finds a keychain belonging to Jessica and the scarf and when she sees Bruce’s name tag on the coat, she realizes her mistake. She apologizes, they work things out and dance to their song before putting on a movie. The twins and Bruce arrive just in time to see them making out on the couch. Aw? Ew?

Jessica accidentally locks herself in her locker and then later finds a bouquet of flowers for Liz, which it turns out are from Michael. Liz meets with Michael and acts like Jessica, dropping hints that Jess is the klutz. Michael asks her out, they go out once and she decides never to date him again because he’s too clumsy for her and not at all self-assured. Yup, sounds about right.