Goosebumps #16: One Day at HorrorLand

Lizzy, her little brother Luke and his friend Clay are out with their parents, driving to a local zoo and amusement park. Their dad decides to not bring along a map, assuming that signs will be posted everywhere telling them how to get to the park. They keep driving and find absolutely nothing: no stores, cars and no other people. They stop to check again for a map and she notices a huge monster looming overhead.

It turns out that they are only one mile away from HorrorLand amusement park and they decide to go there instead. They park in the almost empty lot and as they near the entrance, their car explodes! Mom doesn’t seem too fazed and wants to just enjoy the day. All of the workers are in monster costumes and they promise that they will fix everything. Despite that, dad is still worried and wanders off with mom, trying to find a phone.

The three kids wander off and see some super weird things, like black ice cream, snakes dangling from trees and wolves roaming the park. They decide to get on the doom slide ride and the attendant warns them that if they pick the wrong slide, they’ll slide forever. Lizzy and Luke appear on the other side, but Clay is missing. They go back up and take the same slide he did. They slide for what seems like hours, face bugs and slide through fire, before popping out on the other side of the park.

Lizzy is the only one that realizes the rides are real and the only one that wants to find their parents and go home. The guys just want to keep riding more stuff. They go into a hall of mirrors, only to wind up trapped inside three different mirrored rooms. When they finally get out, they circle the park multiple times and wind up by the alligator pond. The parents show up, tell them they found no phones and decide to just leave.

Their mom decides that they should do one more ride and just have some fun as a family. She picks a floating ride, where you drift along the water in coffins. Halfway through the ride, the coffin lids slam shut and Lizzy finds herself covered in bugs. They get to the other side of the park, climb out and decide to just get the hell home.

Unfortunately the monsters pop up at that moment. The lead worker explains that they were on a Monster Channel reality show and won a new car. All they have to do is walk through a door to the parking lot and get their car. The door leads into a massive obstacle course, which they must finish in 60 seconds or less. Luckily everyone makes it out, but the monsters turn up, revealing that they aren’t wearing costumes, but are real monsters.

They manage to get outside and steal one of the tour buses out front. The monsters start chasing them, but dad drives off into the sunset. When they get home, one lone monster hops off the back of the bus, where he’s been hiding for the whole trip. While they freak out, he hands over a free prize: passes for next season.

*The parents act more concerned about getting a ride home, than their car blowing up. I’d be worried about my insurance!

*Luke constantly screams and nearly wets himself, but then acts like he was only pretending to be scared to freak them out. It reminds me why I never wanted a little brother.